3 a.m. and she’s still awake, lying in the dark, in the too big bed, listening to the sighing hum of her own breath.
It’s about this time of night that he would shift, half-awake and seeking, bring their thighs to meet, brush sleep-purposeful fingers against her belly. The hair on his chest would tickle between her shoulder blades and his breath would burn the back of her neck.
It took years to get used to.
It will take more for her body to forget.
And the incalculably cool space on his side of the bed gnaws at her spine.
This is for Velvet Verbosity's 100 Word Challenge. I stumbled on it today and thought I'd give it a shot... It was especially tempting as I'm currently editing/QAing for the day-job and my poor brain needed a break from the technical side of things.
13 comments:
I love this. The image you create is so evocative. I can feel her pain, see her lying there alone.
Awesome. Welcome to the 100 Word challenge
You do create a vivid portrait of a lost love.
Welcome to the Challenge.
Thank you both for the lovely comments and the welcome.
I find this very poignant and can definitely take this one to heart. Thanks for sharing!
Wow, excellent write. Great imagery!
no words - thank you.
"no words - thank you."
You're welcome. Thank you for commenting.
"I find this very poignant and can definitely take this one to heart. Thanks for sharing!"
Thanks so much. I felt like I wasn't making as much of impact as I'd wanted, so I'm glad to hear people are getting something out of it.
I think you found the perfect way to convey her emptiness and loss. Who can't imagine that loving reassurance in the dark of night and then feel the loss at its absence? Very moving.
Wow, feeling the vivid loss of something that she had to get used to in the first place? Perfectly put together.
This made me imagine myself in this her place so it made me oh so sad. this depth of loss is hard to explain but you did a good job of doing it.
Amazing...the loss is palpable. Like Julie, I imagine myself in the main character's place, and I feel pain and loneliness. Such a gift to be able to evoke such emotion from so few words. Great job, and thanks so much for linking up with us!
Thank you all for the wonderful comments.
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